Greetings From Aunt Flo
by HecateA
Summary: Tonks overhears a conversation she misinterprets wildly, and yes it's embarrassing—but hey, it got them talking. Oneshot.


**Author's Note: **Anyways, to enjoy this fic you need to understand that not all people who menstruate are women—once you've got that, enjoy!

**Disclaimer: **The following characters belong to J.K. Rowling, and this story derives from her original works, storylines, and world. Please do not sue me, I can barely pay tuition.

**Warnings: **NA

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**Stacked with: **MC4A; Shipping War; Seriously Important (Not); Animal Verses; Remains of War

**Individual Challenge(s): **Gryffindor MC; Hufflepuff MC; Bow Before the Blacks; Seeds; Golden Times; Old Shoes; Themes & Things A (Learning); True Colours; Rian-Russo Inversion; In a Flash

**Representation(s): **Remus Lupin; miscommunication

**Bonus challenge(s): **Creature Feature; Second Verse (Odd Feathers); Chorus (Middle Name)

**Tertiary bonus challenge: **NA

**Word Count: **536

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_**Shipping Wars**_

**Ship (Team): **Nymphadora Tonks and Remus Lupin (Technicolour Moon)

**List (Prompt): **Spring Micro 2 (Miscommunication Galore)

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**Greetings From Aunt Flo **

Tonks' mood was spoiled after spending the entire day testifying in front of the Wizenmagot and getting grilled about the latest smuggler she'd brought in—all because he was friends with Lucius Malfoy and ergo had the political sway to try and keep himself out of Azkaban.

That being said, Kingsley had been on her case nonstop, promising that it wasn't her fault that the man might walk, that she'd done everything right, that he wouldn't let her torture herself about this… So she knew she couldn't leave this Order of the Phoenix mixer too early or else he would quite possibly follow her home and shout motivational speeches through the doorway—her roommates would hate that. Or worst, Kingsley might tattle to Mad-Eye and _that _would create its own set of problems. She defaulted to standing by the table of food Molly Weasley had laid out and tried to look busy picking at crackers. It wasn't that she didn't _want _to meet the other members of this new Order, she just didn't have the energy for it right now.

She was wrapped up in her own thoughts and her anxiety about the trial and only heard short snippets from the two men bickering not too far for her.

"I don't care how much you want it Sirius, we aren't sending Cornelius Fudge letters from Voldemort, it's not going to help," Remus said.

"You're no fun at all."

"Someone has to the adult and that's historically been my cross to bear."

"No need to be grumpy about it. You're always like this during your time of the month."

"Shame I never see it coming," Remus answered.

Sirius burst out laughing, but Tonks froze. Oh shit, that was the absolute worst. She'd been the only Auror with a uterus on staff one day and had gotten absolutely blindsided by her own surprise visit by Mother Nature—she'd ended up breaking into Hestia's desk to steal supplies and had wasted a good hour on a cleaning spell her favourite jeans had actively resisted. It had been _awful_. At least she wasn't the only one having a crummy day.

So she thought that it was perfectly reasonable for her to quickly stop by the bench where she'd left her purse, slip a tampon and a pad in her pocket (because everyone had personal preferences), and weave her way back towards Remus—who was pouring himself a cup of punch.

"Hey," she said discreetly. He turned to look at her, smiling friendlily. He frowned when he saw the pad and tampon she was slipping him.

"I overheard you talking with Sirius about how sneaky that time of the month was," Tonks said. "Shark week's terrible, but it's worse when it's a sneak attack, you know?"

Remus grinned.

"You're very kind, but I don't menstruate. It's... slightly more complicated than that," he said.

It occured to Tonks, all of a sudden.

"You're a werewolf," she said. "And it's the full moon… two days from now."

"I believe that's what Sirius was referencing to, yes," he said.

"Right, because that makes sense," Tonks said. She slipped the pad and tampon back into her back pocket. "I'm so glad that this is our first real conversation."

Remus burst out laughing.


End file.
